And what can it do to you?
We’ve looked at how digital abuse happens. Now it’s time to face what it does.
The impacts of tech-facilitated abuse go far beyond “someone read my texts.” This isn’t about inconvenience or privacy preferences—it’s about long-term, often invisible harm. Psychological, social, legal, financial. And it doesn’t stop when the relationship ends, or the phone is finally out of their reach.
These are the real-world consequences.
Psychological harm
Surveillance rewires the brain. Even suspected surveillance can create anxiety, insomnia, panic attacks, and deep distrust of technology. People report feeling like they’re “never alone,” even when the abuser is no longer present.
Many survivors develop symptoms of:
- Hypervigilance (constantly checking devices, surroundings)
- Paranoia (not irrational when it’s based on real events)
- Depression and withdrawal
- PTSD or CPTSD, especially after prolonged exposure
The blurring of boundaries—between home and trap, between device and captor—can lead to a profound sense of disempowerment. It’s hard to rest when your own phone feels like a spy.
Physical safety risks
Digital abuse often enables physical harm.
Real-time location tracking means someone can show up at your home, workplace, child’s school, or favourite café—no need for guesswork. And when smart locks, cameras, or alarm systems are controlled by the wrong person, “home” can quickly become unsafe.
Survivors have reported:
- Sudden appearances at isolated locations
- Blocked exits (via app-controlled doors or vehicles)
- Disabling of alarms or safety alerts
- Tactical “coincidences” designed to intimidate
This isn’t theoretical. It’s planning, masked as technology.
Financial ruin
The economic effects of digital abuse are wide-reaching and long-lasting. From drained accounts to wrecked credit scores, survivors often face years of financial recovery.
Examples include:
- Locked or emptied joint bank accounts
- Fraudulent purchases or subscriptions
- Deliberate sabotage of job applications or online profiles
- Loss of employment due to online defamation or “smear attacks”
- Costs of replacing compromised tech
And even when accounts are eventually secured, the damage—missed opportunities, unpaid bills, overdraft charges—lingers. Many survivors must start again, digitally and financially.
Legal danger
When technology is used to generate or fake evidence, the courtroom becomes a minefield.
Common risks:
- Fabricated screenshots or text messages
- Misused parental control data to paint someone as “unstable”
- Calls for custody or control based on manipulated logs
- Repeated legal complaints designed to drain time and money
Unfortunately, legal systems in many places still lag behind. Police may view digital abuse as “a tech issue.” Courts may dismiss it as “he said, she said.” And expert reports are often expensive or inaccessible.
The burden of proof almost always falls on the survivor—who must now explain subtle, technical abuse to institutions that weren’t trained to see it.
Loss of autonomy
Perhaps the most insidious consequence of all.
Tech-facilitated abuse is a form of coercive control. Each act—whether it’s unlocking your phone, tracking your route, or deleting a calendar entry—chips away at your independence.
Over time, this can lead to:
- Loss of decision-making confidence
- Fear of using technology at all
- Withdrawal from friends, services, or opportunities
- A sense that escape is impossible or pointless
The goal of abuse is not chaos—it’s obedience. When someone controls your technology, they control your time, your choices, and eventually, your self-image. Survivors often describe a slow erosion of autonomy until even simple decisions feel risky.
A word on this section
This is why threat modelling matters.
Because for many survivors, the first step to healing isn’t finding the perfect app or a magic setting. It’s realising: this isn’t my fault. The impacts of digital abuse are real, measurable, and deeply human.
But they can be understood. And once understood—they can be challenged.